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Change your mindset and discover your purpose!

Change your mindset and discover your purpose!

”Allow your passion to become your purpose and it will one day become a profession”

How many of us have a hobby that they enjoy and keep it as ”just a hobby”. Many a times I have faced a lot of mental blocks, more my own doing than anyone criticizing me. Personally I have suffered with confidence issues arising from childhood when I constantly was berated not to speak up, told that I would amount to not much with my scatterbrain (I do have that quality unfortunately). Growing up in an African family household you were taught to accept things as they came and told to respect the elders and never to question or reply as that was deemed back chatting. I grew up being very safe, afraid to take chances/risks or thinking outside the box.

Fast forward 20 years or so that lack of confidence seeped into my adult life, as much as I was great at my job, relationships be they friendships or romantic ones I was never the one who questioned or spoke up when I was hurting. I accepted matters as they were presented. This was my downfall when I came to separation with a long term partner. I had to accept fault to the breakdown of the relationship because I was never outspoken during the relationship I think I might have been what a lot of people would term ”doormat”. I now believe, if there are issues in any type of relationship, one must voice them and this does not mean harshly or rudely, just voice your feelings and communicate. I am still a work in progress finding my feet and working towards ”self belief”. I am a great adviser however not great when it comes to following my advice.

The past few months I have taken bolder steps to work towards believing that ” I am valuable” and that ”I can do whatever I set my heart on”. I have set up a personal challenge to start working on my passion of holistic living and well being and sharing what  I read/research about. I love the idea of being mindful and aligning my heart soul and spirit. One of my exciting passions is exploring endless possibilities of using natural products on my skin and my hair. If you’re interested take a look at one of my blogs here. Everyday is a learning curve for me and I embrace the people and opportunities coming my way. I am working toward a life where I serve people by doing something I absolutely love and I am slowly discovering we, as human beings, are curious creatures and we all love to share and find information, this is an undying trend. There is so much to discover and share on this planet. What makes us that bit special as human race is we are all different, if we accept and embrace that difference, we learn so much from each other. Ask yourself, what tickles your fancy, what is it you do that brings a smile to your face and makes those neurons dance with joy? I believe, if you can answer that, then my dear friend you have found your passion. Explore your passion and discover what you can do with it to serve the world.

”I’ve no special talent, just passionately curious”…………Albert Einstein.

 

Until next time………………………………..

Home made rose water  primer and setting lotion for long lasting make up

Home made rose water primer and setting lotion for long lasting make up

It’s taken me a long time to find the best product to use as a primer for my oily prone skin. Having tried some of the most expensive primers and setting sprays, historically used Nyx, Smashbox, Urban decay and Skindinavia all of these are gorgeous products however they didn’t work for me. Having looked at some videos on YouTube I was sold on the fact that It worked for the reviewers unfortunately they didn’t work for me. Not sure whether  I was not applying the products well I guess I still had a long way to go. I decided to go back to basics and take a long good look at myself and  figure out what I need to do to improve my skin and improve the texture as I was riddled with stress induced acne. It was a challenge to learn to hydrate, I was never a fan of water so my skin was tired, over producing sebum and lacking a natural sheen.

To aid my skin towards health i did the following: –  

  • Drinking water was and is still a daily task I do daily, First, I have to ensure I drink at least 1.5 – 2 litres a day, I’m only starting and I’m sure there are some people out there who will drink more than I  do daily. Drinking water hydrates from inside and will flush out toxins, plumps skin, you will also have clearer glowing skin.
  • Secondly, I had to make sure I was eating healthily and a great way to maximize my veg and fruit intake was making smoothies. I’ve enjoyed creating my smoothies using frozen fruit pieces, ginger, coriander and water, alternatively making a fruit salad topped with natural yogurt.

For the primer I used the following ingredients: –

  • Rose water – It is packed with anti inflammatory properties great for skin that breaks out, pore minimiser, protect the skin from free radicals the list is endless for more information take a look at this brilliant blog post about rose water.
  • 3-4 drops rosemary essential oil – without being dazzled by the beautiful smell, rosemary is my go to oil if I want to smell good (more of making your home made essential oil perfume in another post) It has antiseptic, anti bacterial and anti inflammatory properties. Great for problem skin!
  • mix these two together and you’re good to go.

So imagine having a purposeful primer/spritz that will work in the deep skin layers while you’re going about your normal day to day. I use this product as a toner, spritz it before applying my makeup and during the day as needed and it has replaced the expensive brands that I have used before. I have to confess, I am starting to think of the idea of making my own rose water as seen in this post by Julian Harris.

Let me know how you get on with making your own facial spritz, Until next time…………………………..

 

Practicing self love, your path to spiritual peace

Practicing self love, your path to spiritual peace

How many times do we criticize ourselves when life does not go our way, when we lose our jobs, when a relationship fails? We are our own worst bully. Sometimes life takes a detour from the path we are hoping to lead and we find ourselves desolate, alone and in a dark place. Growing spiritually, is a step by step journey of self awareness, loving ourselves, loving those around us and removing judgement and negativity that clouds our minds. When we lose something, we are quick to blame ourselves due to the fact that we simply think whatever happened must have been due to our inadequacies.

When we get to a place of acceptance and self love we realize the experiences, hardships and tests are just soul strengtheners, life lessons that builds resilience. You are given the chance to reflect and deduce from the issue what you can learn from the experience. It teaches you to rise like a phoenix, to accept that ”the Universe” or the Divine, call it what you believe in, dishes out trials and tribulations you can handle.

When you feeling down and desolate there are a few tips you can practice in your everyday life to build your soul and give your spirit the love it deserves. Speak to your soul

  • Stand in front of the mirror, look yourself in the eye and say out loud

”I love you”

” I believe in you”

” I trust you”

It might not be as easy as writing it down as I have in this post, trust me, looking at yourself in the mirror is tough when you don’t feel you’re adequate to be loved more so loving yourself. If you’re finding it awkward and strange start by just looking at yourself in the mirror for a minute or two, crack a smile if you can. Try this for a few days and when you start feeling confident repeat the mantra ”I love you”, ”I believe in you”, ”I am beautiful”. Repeat this daily and gradually you will notice a change. Self loving is difficult when your mindset is telling you otherwise, rise above that little niggling voice and believe in your mantra. When you start self loving, your whole being prepares you to overcome the challenges we face in our lives. We learn to realize that a challenge is only a hurdle that we can overcome……….

”Work on being in love with the person in the mirror who has been through so much but is still standing”. – Unknown

Let me know how you get on and thank you for taking the time to read this, until next time………………………

Multhani mitti benefits for hair

Multhani mitti benefits for hair

Taking care of natural afro hair requires a regimen consisting of eating healthy, drinking plenty of water and hydrating your curly mane. Whilst my hair is in a protective style during the cold winter months, I still ensure I continue to moisturize and condition my hair and I have found the multani mitti clay as the best clarifying clay that conditions and cleanses my hair. So let’s delve into finding out what this natural ingredient is.

I first discovered this clay during my ”slippery slope” internet searches when I was searching for a natural conditioning product that can condition my hair without containing parabens and sulphates. I became interested in it as it is one of the aryuvedic products hailing from India. ”Aryuveda” is a holistic maintenance of the mind and body with the use of ”mother earths” natural abundance. This product was a great find for me as I realized its uses would be good for my problem skin and for my hair. It has been used for many centuries in India and here are the benefits of this clay

Multani mitti contains silica, calcium, iron and magnesium these minerals are essential for our body, you can imagine the great benefits these will have on your skin, I will write a post on the skin mask, however today we will focus on the hair mask.  I made the  hair mask using the following ingredients. Silica is essential for the hair structure and texture (hence the conditioning properties), calcium is vital for fuller, thicker hair. With iron  promoting hair growth and magnesium helping with absorption of all these wonderful minerals.

Ingredients

  • 4 tbsp  of multani mitti
  • 1 tsp amino acids
  • 2 tbsp of olive oil
  • Coconut milk – enough to mix until you a get a smooth slightly thick paste

Applying the paste

  • Mix all the ingredients until you have a smooth paste, ensure it is not runny as you will end up with the mixture running down your neck!
  • Apply to freshly cleansed hair, (I use castille soap to wash my hair). Others  use a squeeze bottle, depending how thick your mixture is, but I muck straight in there with my fingers as I then finger comb my hair during application.
  • Wear a shower cap, or cling film your head, wrap cling film round until all your hair is under the wrap. I found this the best method as it traps the heat. Leave it for a minimum of 30 mins, I left mine for about 3 hours (why not!!!!)
  • Rinse with luke warm water and ensure all the mixture is washed out of your hair
  • Style as desired, after rinsing, my hair felt so soft and my curl pattern was defined.

I try my best to have this treatment fortnightly, give this a try and I look forward to your comments!

Until next time………………………..

 

 

Forgiving your ex after a break up – relationship tips

Forgiving your ex after a break up – relationship tips

Relationships are as complex as trying to figure out what happens when our souls depart this earth, however as human beings we yearn to love and be loved, sharing memories and wonderful experiences.

You often hear people exclaim that ”Love hurts”, I disagree, Love does not hurt, it is pure and peaceful, we use the term ”love” synonymous  to ”relationship”. Usually when a relationship turns sour, a lot of emotions run rampant and couples suffer and respond to this differently. My question is, ”how do you recover from a break up with some or all of your senses still intact?”, lets be honest there are things some people have done to their exes to express their hurt, some quite funny, others not so good. I’ve heard of a guy who decided to take all his girlfriend’s earrings backs just to annoy her and that was after a break up. That i think is hilarious however some have scratched their exes cars because they found out they’d cheated. It might make you feel good albeit for a short time but when the short lived satisfaction is over the hurt is still there. That’s the same as drinking to drown your sorrows, that is a temporary relief but when you wake up tomorrow the pain and emotions around that issue are still there, together with a banging headache.

We need to focus on how we can recover from the breakup ensuring we have emotional health and most of our dignity, yes i’ve said it, we need to have dignity. From a personal point of view, I have experienced being the one that ended a relationship and also the one that was left heartbroken and in both instances I found the following steps helped me ride the emotional wave whilst at the same time giving me clarity and hope that there will be light at the end of the tunnel. These steps might not help everyone however there are some who might resonate with this.

  • Forgiveness – forgiving the action and forgiving your ex. I  feel that was a great step personally for me following the break up. A lot of times people focus on the hurt they’re going through and in turn harbour a lot of resentment which creates a negative mindset.
  • Negativity does not help moving on. We attract like for like so you can imagine if you have negative intentions you will attract a lot of negativity towards you. Hence you hear people exclaiming how they seem to attract the same type of person. I have come to discover that after a break up you need to ”detox” yourself of anything to do with the person you’re with.
  • Finding yourself- rediscover who you are as an individual, the best way to move on is to find happiness within yourself. We do not need to find a partner to bring happiness. A partner should be someone you have to share the happiness you already have. Find out what you love doing, a new hobby, go out with friends, socialize with the people that care about you and take steps towards your happiness by being happy on your own.
  • Most importantly, Love yourself, love who you are as a person, flaws and all. If you cannot love yourself, how do you expect to love someone else? How do you expect to share any love and be loved too.

When you feel complete within yourself, only then are you able to attract the right person in your life. Life is a lesson in itself so accepting that someone can come into your life for a season to teach some life lessons is a great way to overcome resentment and hate. You will always look back and accept once you have identified what they came to do in your life.

Do you have any steps you’ve taken to overcome a relationship break up? If so what was it? Were they healthy steps? Or are there steps you might want to review and change?

Until next time…………………………..

 

 

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